So what does it mean to surrender; to bring your spirit in line with God’s will, when everything seems like it’s upside down and it feels as though God isn’t there. How do you surrender, or rest or have peace when you’re in the midst of a trial and anxiety is high and troubles abound? Continue reading
A few weeks ago I had a dream and I saw myself walking along a road in a sort of field and to my right there were some people (I would say two or three), and they were talking about me. I don’t know quite how to put it but they were talking about my work for Christ, my writing and ministering to others. I felt a feeling of contentment whilst this was happening and then I heard “she still thinks it’s by works”. All in all, this dream lasted no more than 5-10 seconds it was more of a scene than complete revelation.
Now because I was really tired and the dream was so short I thought it to be my mind, but I still made a mental note of it. I had no idea how relevant it actually was!
What I didn’t realise was I was about to have a mini breakdown the very next week. It began when my eyes were opened to a weakness in me. When this happened I began to feel condemned and like a hypocrite. How can I minister to another person or write when I still haven’t dealt with this issue I have?
That’s where my trouble began. When this happens to me I can’t minister to others, my prayer life falls and bible study suffers and it’s no mystery that the conclusion is I feel distant from God.
There are many times in my life when I have made plans or set goals without really taking into consideration God’s plan. Not that I didn’t consider God at all, but more that I made plans and then committed them to God rather than enquire of the Lord before actually completing my plan. If I’m completely honest with you, most of the time those plans came to ruin and they were often interrupted by God himself.
What I have learned over the years is that not everything that seems good is what God actually wants me to do. I have learned that not every success is good success – in fact for me, true success is the will of God.
This post isn’t for everyone. I’m an extremely open person and there may be some things which not everyone will want to read here about my past etc. But if you are struggling with letting go of the past – the people you have slept with, things you have done, and things that have happened to you that have left you broken – This post is for you.
I want to expose my nakedness in this post in the hope that it will encourage anyone who may be feeling broken.
There are things that we truly desire deep within our hearts, hopes & dreams, things only the Lord Himself would truly know about. Things we don’t necessarily talk about openly, but which stay within us as burning desires.
For me personally there are so many things I wish to see come to fruition in my life; hopes of a family, children, friends, success – basically true rest. In the spiritual sense there are so many promises God has given me which have not yet been fulfilled, or for the purpose of this post – have not yet been claimed.
Today I want to talk about hope – the things we hope for. Some of these things we may have tried to get or to make happen in our own strength, but have not been able to attain them. If we look at some of our deepest desires and truly search our hearts, we will often find that the things we desire the most are actually the things which are beyond our control to attain, things only God Himself can do for us.
You know sometimes I think I have lived most of my life afraid. Sometimes I wonder if I really know who I am at all. I love reading my Bible and meditating on the word, but sometimes I have to ask myself if I really believe what I am reading. I’m talking about really believing; it’s one thing to say you believe or even think you believe but what does believing look like.
So the New Year has begun and for many of us, it’s often an opportunity for us to set goals or perhaps pick up some goals we haven’t quite completed in the previous year, and approach them with a new found energy.